The Labrador Chronicles – Part 2

Oookay puppy lovers…I managed to get my mum to allow me to provide you all with the latest lab report regarding my progress, right here on her blog.

I am pleased to say that my broken leg has healed nicely which means, I have been able to start getting out and about to explore the world at my paws. Not that this hasn’t been a little confusing at times like the first time I went to the park for instance. The hoomans made me wear a straight jacket thing embellished with a bone motif. Now, they do know that bones are not good for me, so why make me look like an advert for a rack of bark bq ribs for pups sake?!

Anyhow, they then proceeded to attach a lead to my embarrassing new outfit though this was obviously not working. Even after I waited very patiently for it to lead me somewhere, anywhere it didn’t seem to have a Scooby-Doo as to where it should take me. In the end, I got bored and lay down instead on the barking lot. This seemed to amuse the hoomans no end which I found a bit woof to be honest, as it was hardly my fault that the sat nav in my lead was pupped. Here is a picture of me trying to show them I didn’t give a pitbull what they thought. 

My day at the seaside was a little more successful. I had decided by then that if I was ever going to see anything properly it was going to be up to me to take the lead. I loved sliding down the sand dunes, paddling in poodles of water but, the ultimutt was jumping over the waves.

I think I blotted my puppy book though when I went over to chat to some ladies who called me over for a cuddle. They were very playful just like my hoomans are when they have been drinking from those glasses with a long stem. I played up to my audience and soon the ladies oohed and aahed in appreciation as I treated them to my best choccie poses. They didn’t even seem to mind when I helped myself to a large slice of pup-er-oni pizza that I had been keeping an opportunistic eye on.

But then, I felt my Hooman dad reel me in with some urgency. In my enthusiasm, I managed to upend the bottle of stuff from which the ladies had been filling their long-stemmed glasses. The contents spilt out onto the sand causing it to turn a vivid shade of crimson, which weirdly was the same shade as my dads face at the time.

Knowing how my Hoomans feel about their carpet I wasn’t particularly worried after all there was still miles of clean beach left. Dad seemed upset though and he gave the ladies something out of his pocket which he later told my mum was the equivalent of a week’s wages. He also told me If I didn’t start behaving he was going to advertise me as ‘Free to a good home’ on Facebook.

Ah well…that’s all I am allowed to report today folks. I think my mum is worried that I might become more pupular than she is. I look forward to bringing you my next lab report soon…woof woof!